Winning Image

The best you possibly can! Looking great will lift your mood giving you a more positive outlook on your life. There is no denying that we are living in very scary and uncertain times. Since there are no guarantees in life today, it is even more imperative that we live each moment to its fullest. And how do we get the most out of each and every day when the news seems to be very grim? By doing the things we enjoy most, with the people we like and love, and by taking care of yourself so that your body and your mind remain strong. The more emotional strength you have, the better you will be at handling things as they come your way. Developing a strong and pleasing image for yourself is the first step.

Your image is not a facade as some might suggest. Rather, it’s an outer expression of your inner thoughts, values and feelings; and if that expression is an accurate one, you will have more courage and the confidence to face each day. You will feel balanced, energized and more generous towards others. The right image draws others to you and that becomes a feedback loop - people perceive you as appealing and approachable and you in turn, feel more positive towards others. A winning image as I refer to it, helps you to create and maintain rapport with others. It’s another tool in your arsenal, so to speak, just like any other skill or asset you have. A positive and an attractive image for you will only add to the quality of your life. There is nothing superficial or inconsequential about that - the enjoyment of your life with others despite the troubling times we live in.

If you are uncertain about your image, now is the time to do something about it. There is no better time than the present to create the life you have always imagined for yourself. After all, today is all that we are promised. Why put off looking your best any longer?

Last week I attended the Women’s Congress Conference at the Miami Convention Center. I was there to see Janet Wood, CEO and Kathy McFadden, President of the Fashion Fit Formula speak about the benefits of their product. "It’s Not What You Wear…But How You Wear It!" I have been a representative for the Fashion Fit Formula for several years now ever since they sponsored the Association of Image Consultants International conference in Atlanta. That’s where I heard them speak for the very first time.

And it was at that conference that I had them take my Fashion Fit Formula measurements so that I could receive a chart and portfolio that was customized specifically for me. It works this way: they take 12 vertical measurements from the top of you head down to your ankle and enter these numbers into a computer which calculates your best balance points, as I like to call them. For instance, the results will give you the exact lengths for your hemlines, neckline, shorts, waistline, jackets and much, much more! It has nothing to do with how much you weigh and it doesn’t change if you lose or gain weight. It’s something that you will use for the rest of your life. The FFF takes the guess work out of shopping for shorts, bathing suits, suits, dresses, formal wear and even your PJ’s. It will also make having your clothing altered easier and quicker. Just refer to the chart for mistake-proof alterations.

And you can believe me when I say that it has changed my life! I had all my clothing that was flattering to me in terms of color and style altered to my exact points as indicated by my Fashion Fit Formula chart. Since very few of us is the ideal in terms of the perfect body proportion, what it does is create the illusion of the ideal for you. You will never look and feel better when you are dressed in clothing that is properly proportioned for you. An added bonus is the increased confidence you will have in your appearance.

I shop for clothing, jewel and even handbags based using my FFF calculations - it has made shopping easier and I make far fewer wardrobe mistakes as a result. Yes, it does require you to be more discriminating about your wardrobe selections, but it will pay off in the end. You will have a wardrobe that flatters you that will last for many years. When you wear clothing that is right for you, it will survive the trends and fads and still look current and stylish. Call me for more information.

How you communicate tells the world who you are and gives others insight into your past experiences. The words you use, your rate of speech, how you move, how you eat and react to circumstances speaks volumes about your education, economic status, professional success and your up bringing. Therefore, it’s essential that you pay attention to everything you do and be conscious of your decisions and resulting behavior. Often people get stuck in behaviors that no longer serve them well and for whatever reason, feel defensive and resistant to learning more positive and effective ways of communicating. This applies to individuals as well as to businesses.

It’s essential that in order to continue growing and developing in your personal and professional life, that you remain open to learning new and better ways of communicating to the world about who you are now. Nobody’s perfect or knows everything; and the image principles that I teach are not part of the typical educational system. Learning about body language, business and dining etiquette is very inspiring and empowering and should not pose a threat to anyone’s ego. Granted no one likes to be told that they are doing something incorrectly especially if they don’t know any better but that’s not the point of image and etiquette coaching. It’s not a matter of right and wrong; rather it’s about learning more appealing and appropriate ways of communicating and interacting effectively with others.

Eliminating blocks to communication and making others feel comfortable and appreciated will help you build rapport with others. In business, the simple gesture of returning phone calls promptly, knowing how to make proper introductions, dining with grace and class, using proper grammar when speaking and being open to the ideas of others will greatly enhance your image in the eyes others.

Conversely, if you avoid business calls, ignore people and render them "socially invisible" by not making proper introductions, dine without the social graces, use improper language and close others down from expressing themselves, you’ll damage to your relationships and how others view you. If you’re in business, you could be unknowingly offending others and this will definitely impact your bottom line. Socially, it will affect the success of your relationships if you annoy others because of your irritating behavior.

Self-awareness and professional image and etiquette coaching can teach you how to interact with confidence and grace. Knowing how to act in a myriad of situations will give you a distinct advantage in the marketplace that will translate into increased referrals and repeat business. In your personal relationships, it will translate to better communication and fewer inter-personal conflicts. Smart business people know that image and etiquette training is essential for the success of a business especially in today’s troubled market. What’s going to set you apart from the competition? For good or bad, it could be your image.

It’s not, "How are you?" If one more stranger (a person that I’m not acquainted with) asks me how I am, I’m going to scream! Maybe you can relate. When I go shopping, everywhere store I enter I am encountered with "How are you?" Depending upon where I go, I can be asked how I am about 10 - 20 times each day! These people include sales staff, grocery clerks and just about anyone I encounter when I am out and about. What’s the problem with asking that question? They don’t know me and they are not interested in the answer. Beside, asking me how I am is a personal question and quite frankly, it’s none of their business!

Since our communication needs to be authentic and appropriate to be effective, asking someone a personal question when you are not formally acquainted or interested in the answer is insincere. You don’t ask a question unless you are seriously interested in the answer. "How are you?" has become a greeting that’s more common than hello, good afternoon, good morning, is it raining outside, how may I help you, did you find eveything you need and what’s your name? What ever happened to Hello, my name is ____ and how can I help you?

Please stay out of my personal business until I invite you in - at least until we are more familiar. Our communication has become too casual, in my educated opinon. "Hey you guys" is another common greeting that is more irksome than chalk grading on a blackboard. What ever happened to proper English and the social graces.

More about this later…

You’re not alone if you watch the the makeover programs on televsion and wonder to yourself, "How can I use this information in planning my own business casual wardrobe?"

I think that for most people it would be very difficult. In fact, many of these fashion and makeover segments are created by stylists who may or may not have any image training in their backgrounds. Many of these segments are produced to entertain and to promote retailers, media outlets and clothing designers. Certainly, I would not advise my clients to use the information provided in those programs as a guide for the appropriate business dress.

Another observation is that many of these programs are based on the latest fashion trends which may or may not apply to you depending upon your occupation and the workplace status quo. If you work in a conservative environment or have conservatively dressed clients, a high-fashion look might be viewed as less credible - and you run the risk of not being taken seriously by your peers, prospects and clients. The more high-fashion you dress, the more of a distraction you will create for others and you’ll likely be considered to be a "light-weight." The exception of course is if you work in a high-fashion, innovative or trend-setting industry such as magazine publishing, interior decorating, advertising, etc.

My best advice to you is keep your wardrobe current and don’t dress radically in any one direction lest you run the risk of alienating others who are more conservative than you. It’s your call and your career. My best advice to you is in these 3 steps:

• Know who your audience is and how they dress.
• Decide what you would like to convey to others in terms of your message.
• Then design your image to support your message and to reflect the quality of your work.

More about this later…

You might have been there… On October 11^th at Benvenuto’s restaurant, I presented to an impressive group of attractive and accomplished women from the Palm Beach County Chapter of NAWBO. My topic: What the Well-Dressed Woman Wears in Business and The Power (and Magic) of the Jacket. The conversation was lively as we discussed different business scenarios and global dressing. I ended my talk by asking the audience to close their eyes and take a mental inventory of their closets: what works, what doesn’t, what needs tailoring, what haven’t you worn and what makes you feel great? Then I encouraged everyone to begin eliminating the clothes that no longer suits their needs. You could hear grumbling from many of the women as they left the meeting and headed home to face the inevitable – the choas in their closets!

“What’s next?” you ask. “DO NOT GO SHOPPING!” – not yet, this isn’t the next step. Believe me, it’s not the solution to what ails you. What often happens is that you’ll make the same purchases again and again, spending more money on clothes that don’t work for you. You’re better off keeping your money in the bank where it can do some good rather than hanging in your closet. The next step is to learn more about your body, your style type and your coloring, and to assess your wardrobe and lifestyle goals more clearly. Shopping occurs with a plan only after you’ve assessed your wardrobe needs.

There are three tools that are indispensable in determining your best professional image. The Universal Style Profile indicates by way of a questionnaire whether you are traditional, elegant, sporty, feminine, creative, and /or dramatic. The results are based on your body type, preferences, goals, values, lifestyle and personality traits. It’s an invaluable tool in determining which clothing styles flatter you, how your clothes should fit, and your most flattering fabrics and accessories; and for women, how your makeup and hair should be styled. Men find this information invaluable as well, although their feminine category is called romantic, and the alluring category is called sexy, for obvious reasons. If you choose your wardrobe based on your style types no matter what you’re doing and where you’re going, you will have a consistent look which is the goal to creating an effective image. An effective image is consistent.

The second most valuable tool is custom color analysis that uses over two thousand colors to determine the colors that are most flattering for you. The colors are chosen to compliment your natural landscape which includes your hair, skin and eyes. Color is the first thing that people see when they look at you and it’s the basis for building your wardrobe. Wearing the right colors will make you feel great, look healthy and more attractive and even appear more approachable. People are naturally drawn to people who look great and feel confident about themselves. Only custom color analysis can accurately determine your most flattering colors. Predetermined color plaettes like those found in seasonal color analysis are faulty. They don’t work for various reasons. Your custom color palette can be used to determine the color of your car, the interior of your home, etc. since everything you use is an extension of you. I recommend that my clients carry their color fan with them for easy reference so that they can choose the best colors for them when making a purchase.

The third tool that I provide for my female clients is the Fashion Fit Formula. It is a personalized chart containing your best hemlines, sleeve lengths, neck lines, etc. The calculations are based on 10 vertical measurements which are then fed into a computer. The measurements determine the best proportion and fit specifically for you. Altering your clothing according to the Fashion Fit Formula will turn your clothing into designer looking fashions. This is another image tool that will change your life, save you time and money, and give you unsurpassed confidence in your appearance. The good new is that since it relies on your vertical measurements, if you gain or lose weight the measurements remain the same. My clients had everything in their wardrobes (that were the right color and style for them) altered to their FFF specifications; and they use their charts to shop for clothing and accessories that are just right for them. It takes the guess work out of finding clothing with the perfect proportion for you.

Money is not the central issue when planning a wardrobe. I know this is true because most of us spend money on clothes that end up as clutter in our closets. How much money have you spent on clothing that you never wear? For many people, the amount is considerable but you don’t have to despair; it doesn’t have to be that way any longer. Why not make informed decisions based on greater self-awareness of what flatters you? If you plan your wardrobe strategically, you can have an image that works for you. Your image is your most powerful marketing tool - fine tune it and make it your advantage.

Business men and women, is your appearance tripping you up? Does your professional image compete with your company’s message? Does your appearance (the way you look and act) speak louder than your words?

If you answered, “yes” to any of these questions, your appearance is having a negative impact upon your business’ reputation and ultimate success. If your clients and prospects are distracted and find your appearance to be more compelling and memorable than your words, then your image clearly demands your full attention. With planning and attention to detail, you can design your appearance to support your message, build rapport with your audience, and to create a positive reputation that follows you everywhere. Avoid these pitfalls and you will increase your confidence and reputation and thereby increase your sales:

Understand your audience and their expectations regarding your appearance - and then meet their expections. For example, wearing a summer suit while presenting to an audience up north during winter. This might cause some to question, “What was he/she thinking? Didn’t they do their homework?” You can risk losing your audience this way. Know your audience and how they dress; then dress with your message and their expectations in mind.

Avoid wearing bright colors when presenting to a small audience where you have eye contact with all of the participants. A color that speaks louder than you might distract your audience. For a small audience in a small room, wear neutral colors. Save your bright colors for large groups, so your audience can spot you at a distance.

Avoid dressing like a fashion plate. Following fashion trends might serve you well socially, but in business people might assume that you’re unreliable and not serious about your work. Unless you’re in a creative industry or your audience consists of artsy or techno types, stick to more conventional business attire; looking trendy before a conservative audience can undermine your authority.

Avoid looking stale or dated. How you look is an indication of how you think. Looking dull or stuck in another decade encourages others to assume that you are unaware of yourself, the environment and the times. Just as it’s important to keep up with developments in business, it’s equally important to keep your wardrobe current and looking contemporary.

Avoid wearing cheap, worn or tired clothes. People will assume that your work is not quality if your clothes look bad. Wear the best quality clothing you can afford. People will then assume that you’re discerning and that your work is of an equally high standard.

Avoid wearing ill fitting attire. If you are buying ready-to-wear off the rack there is a strong possiblity that it won’t fit your body just right. Each designer uses their own ideal body type to meet their specifications when designing their clothes. Assume when you buy a skirt, dress, shirt , jacket or pant that it will need to be altered for the proper fit on you. Many department stores offer tailoring services to the customers. When trying your own personal tailor for the first time, get a recommendation and have the tailor begin with only one item so that you can be sure of the quality of their work. Remember that poorly tailored clothing will create a distraction for others and undermine your credibility. You will not be considered well-dressed unless your clothes fit your body properly.

Avoid revealing too much skin. It’s incorrect for women to assume that warm climates exempt them from the universal guidelines of appropriate business dress. Wearing revealing clothes distracts and confuses your audience from the business at hand; and renders you vulnerable and touchable especially in the eyes of men. While this might work for you socially, for more power, credibility and authority show less skin.

Avoid wearing focal points that demand attention. “Look at me! No… over here, look at me!” Focal points such as colored buttons, white stockings, unpolished shoes, wrinkled collars, cleavage, short skirts, too much jewelry, strappy sandles, stelleto heels, cheap ties, stains, over bleached hair, incorrect makeup, bright nail polish, outdated hair cuts, nose and ear hairs, etc. – will keep your audience busy and fascinated by your lack of attention to detail. Make sure that you don’t give your audience too many things to look at and examine while you are communicating your message. Keep your appearance simple, neat and attractive. When you dress for a presentation, keep in mind that your audience’s attention is where their eyes are focused. Where do you want your audience’s attention to be?

Avoid wearing accessories that move or make noise when you move. Anything that moves on your person will attract others away from your message. Avoid noisy keys, coins and bracelets, dangling earrings, too many rings, hair accessories, tattoos and body piercing.

Avoid wearing colors that make you look tired or dull. People are attracted to people who look healthy, energetic, attractive and confident. Your business attire should flatter the natural landscape found in your skin, hair and eyes, and be a natural extension of you. Know what colors enhance you, and if you don’t know, have an expert custom color analysis done. When you look well, people will naturally assume that you’re doing well.

Avoid looking cold and unapproachable. Smile and you’ll break down barriers between you and your prospects. Most likely, they’ll smile back because smiling is so contagious. Additionally, a smile will take years off your appearance. And when your prospects see that you’re enjoying yourself, they’ll be more receptive to listening, learning and buying.

Your image tells the world who you are. In fact, 55% of people’s perceptions of you are based on their visual impressions; and only 7% is based on what you say! A whopping 83% of the our decisions are based on our visual observations! Through proper wardrobe selection tell the world that you’re a professional with expertise, a defined image and a clear message. Your appearance (how you look and act) is your most powerful marketing tool – develop it and constantly refine it and use it to your advantage!

You don’t have to look like a Barbie doll for people to want to do business with you. Being perfect is not the point of developing an effective business image. Perfection is not interesting and it puts people off – it’s unattainable, unrealistic and unapproachable. People won’t want to do business with you if they see you as anything but real. The authentic you is the image you want to project.

Developing a positive image is essential because people want to do business with people they like, trust and feel comfortable with. If you project an image fitting that description, people will naturally be drawn to you. An authentic image removes barriers in business relationships; an ineffective image creates them. The idea is to tailor your image to the best of who and what you are.

However, there are some common elements of a successful image that you as a businesswoman want to convey. These elements include being responsible, efficient and trustworthy. You also want to impress people with the fact that your work is of a consistently high quality.

To achieve a successful business image you don’t have to surf the Internet, study in the library, or rummage through old boxes in your garage. You already have the raw materials - it’s YOU.

Now you need to know how to refine what you already have. In my blog you’ll learn how to:

• Discover who you are

• Assess your goals and pinpoint your image challenges

• Evaluate your body type and determine your style type

• Choose flattering colors

• Audit your closet and shop with a plan

• Groom your skin, hair and nails

• Keep your image current

To get you in an image frame of mind, here’s a sneak peek at what we’ll be doing in the upcoming articles. Ask yourself, “Who is the person I would like to project?” Some points to consider: the nature of your work, who your audience is and the message you’d like to convey. We’ll discuss these topics and more so check back with us again.

Picture this familiar scene: The Florida chapter of a professional association recently gathered for their daylong meeting at a posh South Florida hotel. It was a rainy Saturday and the first meeting for the new chapter president. As usual, a speaker with a fine reputation was on the program agenda. These meetings are held bi-monthly so there was much anticipation regarding the quality of the presenters. It was a full house, and the chapter members and guests were seated around the room classroom style, eager for the meeting to begin. The official announcements and chapter business were conducted first, prior to the speaker’s introduction. Immediately following the reading of her impressive introduction, the audience applauded enthusiastically as the speaker walked to the front of the room.

And then it happened… a speaker’s worst nightmare! As she stood in front of the room with all eyes upon her and before she spoke a single word, this much anticipated speaker lost her credibility. Her professional appearance fell far short of this audience’s expectations. Though her credentials looked good on paper, her appearance didn’t support her. When she elaborated on her expertise as a consultant who works only with high-level achievers, it was very difficult for the audience to imagine. Her unprofessional appearance was so out of sync with her message that it spoke louder than her words. The audience wanted her to do well, but it was enticing and far more interesting to focus on her out-dated, unflattering, whimsical appearance rather than on the content of her presentation. Without meaning to, the speaker had created a serious and uncomfortable distraction for her audience, one that she was unable to overcome.

To this day this speaker is most remembered by her audience for how unprofessional and unbelievable she looked. It’s unfortunate that her expertise and professional reputation were undermined in this way. Had she paid more attention to the visual aspect of herself and to the message her appearance conveyed, the audience might have been able to focus on her words, rather than on her unflattering appearance.

My hope is that this story erases any doubt in your mind that your bottom line is directly impacted by your professional image. People decide if they want to know you, let alone do business with you, based solely on how you look. You know this to be true because you make these kinds of decisions every day. Largely your reactions are instantaneous and unconscious but they are powerful nonetheless. Ultimately, the product you’re selling is yourself and if you choose to look unprofessional, you’re sabotaging your business and alienating future prospects.

As a businessperson, it’s especially important that your appearance reflect quality, and the level of expertise and success exemplified in your work. A professional image that flatters you and supports your message will give you a distinct advantage in the marketplace, placing you above the competition. Is this one of your goals?

How can you develop your best professional image? First you need to look at yourself in a full-length mirror, put your ego aside and answer these questions:

• Do you struggle each morning deciding what to wear?

• Does the way you look undermine your confidence and cause confusion for you?

• Are you basing your wardrobe choices solely on comfort?

• Does your wardrobe become you or is your clothing wearing you?

• Women are you revealing too much skin or body shape?

• Does your hair and makeup compliment you or are they a distraction for others?

• If you wear a uniform, do you look polished and well groomed?

• Do your wardrobe colors flatter you and convey credibility?

• Is your image consistent and does it denote quality and your level of expertise?

• When was the last time you updated your appearance?

If answering these questions objectively poses a challenge for you, you could ask a friend or colleague for their honest opinion, read image books, attend image seminars or even consult with an image professional. What worked in the past probably doesn’t apply today and this is especially true as we age. Developing your best image is a process and as you grow professionally, so should your image. You appearance is your visual resume. Don’t let it be your weakest link!

Gone are the days when men and women will accept growing older gracefully. Thanks to the baby boomer generation, our expectations and outlook on aging have changed dramatically. With advances in health and fitness and the general acceptance of plastic surgery, youth is no longer wasted on the young. We can all expect to feel and look great well into our later years.

Looking youthful begins with how we think about ourselves and others. Maintaining a positive outlook on life creates a joyful spirit, eyes that twinkle and a face that holds a smile easily. It is vitally important to how you look, act and feel and how others react to you. Ultimately we are the creators and controllers of our moods, thought, attitudes and happiness. The first stage in looking younger is to lighten up and decide to enjoy your life. Smile and you will break down barriers and take years off your appearance.

With all the information in the media about health and fitness, it’s no surprise to you that your life style is a big factor in how you age. We all live in a busy and constantly demanding world. Good food, plenty of water, exercise and getting at least 8 hours of sleep on a regular basis will improve the condition of your skin, your demeanor, your health and your vitality. Developing and maintaining good habits is essential to looking youthful; make it an important part of your lifestyle each and every day.

If you ask women, by the time they are in their forties they have adopted a preferred hairstyle and length. One of the quickest ways to look younger is to have long hair cut to a medium or short style. Hair above the shoulders lengthens the neck, creates a slimmer upper body and face. As many women will attest, the right hair style can lift their mood and impact their outlook on life. That’s the power of a great hair cut. If you don’t have great hair, look into other options such as hair extensions, hair pieces and wigs. The technology today has made them appear more realistic, natural and affordable. Television and film celebrities have been using hair augmentation for years - don’t be afraid to try it: you just might find the right look that will improve your self image and take years off your appearance.

Coloring your hair is probably the most dramatic thing you can do to turn back the clock especially if your hair is grey. However, turning back the clock involves more than just dying your hair any color. The right color is one that flatters your natural landscape. As we get older we tend to lose pigment in our hair, skin and eyes which means that your original hair color may no longer suit your coloring today. Be careful not to dye your hair too dark which may look harsh or a certain blonde which may be perceived at grey. While grey haired men are thought of as distinguished, many grey haired women are often sidelined especially in the workplace.

We cannot talk about looking youthful without discussing the largest organ of your body which is your skin. A great looking face at any age begins with great skin. A regular and high quality skin care regime is critical to a youthful appearance and will repay you many times the price you paid with positive compliments and a healthy, youthful glow. It is particularly important to carefully manage dry skin as it can be the cause of wrinkles and premature aging. And by all means, protect your skin from the aging effects of the sun! You must always protect your skin as it is a great indicator of your mood, age and health. Your skin does not lie.

Beautifully shaped eyebrows frame your eyes, just as your hairstyle frames your face. It’s no exaggeration to say that your brow shape can make or break you look. Well-shaped brows can also take years off your appearance. And although brow shapes may come and go the basics of shaping stay the same. For a perfectly shaped brow, I recommend that you have your eyebrows shaped by a professional. Fill in sparse hairs with a brow color that matches or flatters your hair color and skin tone.

As a woman’s face begins to show signs of aging, it’s very tempting to try to camouflage everything with a heavier foundation and more powder. However, this will only result in a more aged looking face. As with many things in life, ‘less is more’ and makeup is no exception.

If you wear eyewear you might consider wearing contact lenses or having corrective surgery. If you must wear eyeglasses, they deserve to be selected thoughtfully with quality, your age, coloring, face shape, lifestyle and personality in mind. Size does matter and anything out of sync with the rest of society will leave you looking aged and out of date. Rimless styles are wonderful for opening up the face. To lift and rejuvenate your face, select styles that encourage attention upward and outward – they will help to visually uplift the face.